How to Introduce Sex Toys into Your Relationship Without the Awkwardness

Introduction: Why It Matters

Bringing sex toys into a relationship can feel daunting — not because the idea isn’t exciting, but because many of us aren’t taught how to talk about pleasure, let alone how to expand it. But introducing toys doesn’t need to be awkward or intimidating. In fact, it can deepen trust, boost intimacy, and open up playful new possibilities.

1. Get Clear on Your “Why”

Before bringing it up with your partner, think through what you’re hoping to explore or enhance. Is it about solo play? Mutual pleasure? Spicing things up? The clearer you are, the easier it is to communicate your desires without misinterpretation.

2. Pick the Right Moment

Timing is everything. Don’t bring it up mid-argument or as a surprise in the bedroom. Choose a neutral, comfortable moment when you’re both relaxed — like during a walk, over dinner, or while cuddling.

3. Frame It as a Shared Adventure

Use language that invites exploration: “What would you think about us trying something new together?” or “I’ve been curious about adding something playful — want to talk about it?” Positioning it as mutual rather than personal keeps the conversation light and inclusive.

4. Normalize Curiosity

Everyone has different comfort levels, but curiosity is healthy. Reassure your partner that using toys isn’t a sign something’s missing — it’s a way to enhance what you already enjoy.

5. Start with Something Simple

Don’t go straight to the deluxe 12-function remote-controlled gear. Start small — maybe a bullet vibrator, a vibrating ring, or a massage toy. Ease into it and build comfort over time.

6. Shop Together

Exploring an online store or visiting a boutique together can turn it into a fun, shared experience. Choose retailers that focus on education, body-positivity, and consent to ensure a judgment-free zone.

7. Set the Mood, Not the Pressure

When you’re ready to try something, create a relaxed atmosphere with soft lighting, music, and a sense of play. Keep communication open, and be ready to pause or laugh — both are part of the process!

8. Debrief Afterwards

Talk about what felt good, what was awkward, what you might want to try again (or differently). This deepens connection and ensures both partners feel seen and heard.

Conclusion

Adding toys to your relationship isn’t about replacing anything — it’s about expanding your pleasure toolbox and having fun with someone you trust. With a little openness and curiosity, it can be one of the most rewarding things you do together.